Forgive those who sin against me
by HiddenPortrait
Summary: bryrei angst ridden stuff :P everytime bryan does soemthing rei forgives him....


Forgive my sins as I forgive those who sin against.

They lay on the couch together like a nice normal couple, although they were far from it. Bryans body was rigid and unmoving, while Rei's seemed to flow over Bryan like a river, filling all the gaps so they were close. Bryan was flicking one of Rei's spikes of hair while his lover half dozed in the fading sunlight, some foreign but soft melody played in the background, Rei's music was always like that. Strange, confusing and yet breathtaking. Much like Rei himself.

"who's making dinner?" sighed Rei, half asleep.

"a pointless question" Bryan said harshly but Rei could hear the love in it (or what he hoped was love)

Rei chuckled, "you should learn to cook, I'm sick of doing it all the time"

"but you're good at it" Bryan's mouth twitched, as though a smile wanted to come.

"perhaps we should invite the guys over tomorrow for dinner, Kai and Tyson and Max and Kenny…"

Bryan scowled, "they don't like me"

"they don't understand you" Reis hand reached up as he faced the man he loved. Gently he stroked his face, "you're a good person Bryan…"

"you're a fool" Bryan whispered.

"no more then you"

"don't you hate me for what I did to you?"

Rei somehow pushed himself closer to Bryan, "I hate what you did but I could never hate you"

"hn." Bryan sounded unnervingly like Kai, "we'll see"

"enough melancholy" Rei kissed Bryan before rising, "what would you like for dinner?"

The phone rang and rang. Rei sighed leaving his precious TV behind he answered the phone, "hello Rei speaking" he said cheerfully.

"Bryan" a familiar and chilling voice replied.

"uh…he'll be home at 7. Can I take a message?" the phone hung up.

Later that night when Bryan was eating his dinner with a grinning Rei watching the phone rang again.

"that damn phone" Rei cursed, remembering the incident from earlier.

"I'll get it" Bryan answered before the third ring, "Bryan…uh…" he looked shaken.

"Bryan who is it?" Rei said carefully observing but there was no answer.

"when? No I…of course" Bryan looked defeated, more so then after the first time Rei shunned his advances. He hung up the phone.

"who was it?" asked Rei trying to be casual.

"I have to go" Bryan said to the floor.

"now? Where?" Rei demanded.

Bryan sighed, "…work…" he was always a poor liar.

"no it wasn't…." Rei whispered.

"I'll be home soon" Bryan picked up his coat.

"I love you" Rei reached out to grab Bryans hand but missed, "I love you more then life itself"

Bryan looked up at him, fear shinning through his attempt at carelessness, "you cant know what that means"

"do you love me?"

"I live here with you don't I?"

"cant you say it?"

"I'm going to be late" He turned and left. Rei watched the closed door for several minutes before cleaning up.

Another late night phone call.

"Don't answer it" snapped Rei immediately. It rang.

"I have to"

"Don't! please!" it rang

"I have to"

"you think I couldn't tell who it was? You think I don't know whats going on?" it rang

"I have to" he whispered picking up the receiver, "hello…sorry"

When he was on the phone all of Bryans strength, his size, his personality melted away. He was a weak child in big trouble. Rei glared until Bryan finally hung up.

"I'm going out"

"don't" Rei grabbed his lovers arm, "don't leave me"

"I'll come back"

"all of you?" he asked, tears welling.

"what do you mean? Of course"

"You're disappearing again Bryan. You're becoming the person you used to be. Fight this, stay here and I'll help you but please fight this" he begged.

"I'll be home soon" Bryan strode from the room but Rei was following. He managed to get in front of his love.

"Stop! I know everything Bryan! I know you're doing horrible things because he tells you to. I know you're hurting people!"

"move Rei" his vice was low and dangerous

Rei shook his head fearfully, "no…no I can't, I wont let you go! You don't have to do this. I know you're a good person, I know that you can do something positive in this world!"

"you expect far too much from me, now move!" Bryan came right up close, hoping to scare him but Rei stood there.

"I wont!"

"move!" Bryan roared swinging his arm up and in an instant Rei was sprawled on the floor. Bryan looked down at Rei shocked. Rei looked up heartbroken, "Rei I…"

"Don't go…please…"

"I'll be home soon" Bryan opened the door.

"I love you" Rei sobbed but the door closed.

It was early morning, sometime after 6 am when Bryan came through the door. He smelt food, bacon, eggs frying. He went straight to his room and looked around, her knew he should leave but didn't know what to put his clothes in. Rei was supposed to be at work…

"Hello stranger" Rei beamed at him from the door in a ridiculous pink apron, "I made us breakfast. I guessed you'd be hungry, or am I wrong?"

"breakfast for me?" it was like some strange backwards apology. Shouldn't Bryan be making up for what he did.

"of course, I love you Bryan" he moved in, slipping his fingers into Bryans.

"why aren't you angry?" Bryan said through clenched teeth, "kick me out, yell at me, something!"

"What did I say the first day we started dating?"

"it doesn't matter what you said-"

"I promised I would never hurt you and I loved you. Nothing changes."

"you make forgiveness sound so easy" Bryan said, eyes welling with tears he thought he'd never have.

"you make it sound so hard." Rei gave him a gentle kiss, a kiss that only Rei could give, "come on you need some food"

The phone rang and Bryan picked it up in the other room. Carefully Rei picked up another receiver and listened. He gasped. Heard the phone hang up and the door close.

"no…not this…" he said his voice quivering with fear.

Bryan stood there facing Kai with his gun, ready to do what he was trained to do, what he'd been told to do. Kai faced him back, angry, angry Kai.

"I knew we shouldn't have trusted you" he hissed, "I don't give a fuck if you kill me but how dare you hurt Rei like this!"

"this has nothing to do with Rei" snapped Bryan.

"this has everything to do with Rei"

"you're just trying to save you're skin"

Kai laughed, "save my own skin? Like I care! You think my life has anymore meaning then yours?"

"BRYAN!" the voice rang. It was Rei. He'd found the building that they were meeting in, "Stop!" he ran in front of Kai.

"Rei get the fuck out of here" snapped Kai.

"I can't. I wont let this happen!" yelled Rei, tear falling all over his face. Bryan thought that he looked hideous and yet so very very beautiful.

"You have to move Rei" said Bryan calmly.

"no…" Rei just shook his head, "I can't let you do this"

"you cant save your friend, now just move"

"you think I'll give up that easily?" Rei was almost laughing, "now who's the fool?"

"I'll do it Rei, I'll shoot you down. Don't you think I wont."

"Rei move it now!" roared Kai.

"never!" cried Rei. Bryan looked away or a spilt second before pulling the trigger. Rei was on the ground, blood pouring out everywhere. Kai was holding him, sobbing. Kai Hiwatari was sobbing! Bryan dropped his gun and rushed to his one true loves side.

"you idiot you complete and utter fucking idiot!" Bryan said coming closer, ull of rage, but he wasn't sure at who.

"I told you" Rei managed to say in much pain.

"no Rei just stay with us, I'm calling the ambulance now…" Kai had his cell out, "hello I need an ambulance! He's been shot"

Rei smiled at Bryan, "you hesitated…I was right"

"fuck off Bryan just fuck off" Kai was yelling but Rei just lay there smiling.

"something…positive…"

"Rei no…stay awake, you have to stay awake!"

"I love you" he whispered, hardly audible over Kai shouts.

"I wish I had loved you, I really do"

Rei closed his eyes. And that was that.

The sun shone merrily that day but the wind blew mercilessly. Bryan sat through the funeral, outcast by himself and others so he sat alone, at the back. He didn't know why he was there. It was outside and even though they had tears in their eyes Max and Tyson laughed cheerfully when Tyson hat blew off into Max's face. Bryan wanted to stop them, wanted to stop everyone from enjoying this day when he couldn't. But something held him down…was it guilt? It was a quick and vibrant ceremony, so much like his lover. Then they played some of that music. That painfully comforting music that Rei would have going on in their little home. Soon people were moving away to the wake, held at Tysons house. A lot glared at him on their way past. Before he could escape Kai came up to him.

"You bastard, you fucking bastard!"

"leave me alone Kai, I've suffered enough"

"what?" Kai looked at him incredulously, "enough? Oh no you can never ever suffer enough Bryan."

"He died saving you" spat Bryan, trying to shift the weight off of himself.

Kai laughed again, "you're an idiot. You didn't deserve anything he gave you"

"stop laughing!"

"I cant help it you're so braindead! He wasn't saving me that night. I mean he cared about me but what he wanted to do that night was save you."

"no…no he…"

"shut up Bryan and listen to every word I have to say. He loved you, more then anything else in this world. He loved you to death, literally."

"and now I'm alone, are you happy? I know that he was the only one who would ever love me"

"know why?" Kai was crying again, with frustration or sorrow it was unclear.

"I…"

"he forgave you. For everything you did. Makes me wonder if he was as stupid as you…"

"he wouldn't have forgiven me for this, no one can"

Kai punched him, sending him to the grass, "he already has! He forgave you with his dying breath and he loved you with his whole heart until it stopped beating. That's the only reason you aren't in priso0n right now you sad little shit because he wouldn't have been so upset with that. But we know, we all know."

Bryan fumbled to stand up and with one last frightened look he ran as fast as he could but he couldn't run from memories.

"why do you always forgive me at once?" growled Bryan cleaning up the milk and flour from his failed attempt at cooking.

"no use crying over spilled milk" giggled Rei but stopped when he saw the utter frustration in his loves face, "I forgive you because if I can then other people can and then you know that you wont ever be alone and unloved…someone will forgive you"

"for anything?" Bryan asked with a snort

"for everything"

AN; another weird reo/bry fic for me this is actually inspired somewhat by a convo I had with a very dear friend.

Hope you enjoy griffie


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